Charles Bonnet Syndrome

woman in white long sleeve shirt sitting on chair

Naked in colors, I lay my head down

no eye wants to see empty

so I filled the blurred parts in

with a spectrum of futures;

some clean, some soiled, some stolen

some moving away, others creeping closer

none that involved you

some that didn’t involve me

and a haunting, bright as daylight

chasing my now, breathing down my neck

spelling out what no one said I’d become.


woman in black tank top and black pants standing on gray wall

Instead of testing my wings

I tried to evaluate my ability to fall.

Did you know that halos turns into horns

so that god can no longer grip them?

You do not always wake up

before hitting the ground.

Pain can be felt in any dream.

Dreams can be built from any hurt.

Descent may come by any hand.

Cut the rope before they have a chance

to let go.


topless woman covered with smoke in black background

I cried my sight down the baptismal font

The devil got me a new pair of eyes

that pierced through every false friend

and thieving lover lost in the night

cleansed the shadows from the corners

and added beauty to my broken glass path

my reflection seems so much taller now

the world rendered in new shapes

my footsteps pointing forward instead

of the home I once knew

needing no one’s light to guide me

ever again.


Where did you go, girlwolf?

I found your skin on the porch

still dripping, still smelling

with captivity.

Did you ever think of staying

where the world can’t touch you?

Too eager to be seen,

too wild to be kept silent.

Dance naked on their gazes.

Never eat from their hands again.


Kostnadsfri bild av attraktiv, behaglig, blomma

Like many girls,

I was born with a grenade pin in my hand

I spend the nights listening

to the silent countdown

I’m a rootless and fragile thing

in a hurry to live

before I’m torn apart by my delusions

cry metal,

bleed out everything

I’ve ever owned